10+ weeks post-op: an extraordinary thing

A few days ago, I had my 10-week surgiversary. I'm off 3 of my medications, down 47 pounds from my highest and down 30 pounds since surgery. I'm down two pants sizes. I've gone to yoga class twice and am in my second week of cardio workouts at the gym (30 minutes three times a week to start).

This week, work has been stressful. Tuesday afternoon I stopped at the gym on my way home, and walking on the treadmill felt GOOD. And this afternoon, my neighbor and I went for a walk; we did the longer loop (1.25 miles), briskly, and I felt GREAT. I don't think I've ever felt good or great exercising. If I exercised, I endured it. Suddenly I'm enjoying it, something I haven't done since I was a teenager. Monday I have an evaluation with a personal trainer, and I'm so excited. 

Brainstorming

There's another real positive this week. A few times, my therapist and I have talked about what I'll do when I want to eat for comfort. What comforts me? I asked myself, and the answer was easy: snuggling with my husband. Great! Snuggling with Paul is a great way to cope. 

The funny thing is, when I needed comfort, Paul was at work. So no snuggling. So I reverted, kind of. I stopped at CVS and bought a snack-size bag of kettle-cooked chips. I went home, took care of the dogs and then crawled in bed with my chips and a book. 

They tasted okay. They didn't taste great or disgusting. I enjoyed the crunch. I enjoyed the salt. I didn't enjoy the oil. 

My therapist has been encouraging me to notice without judging, and that's what I did. I noticed my decision, my reaction, my experience. I haven't told myself I was "bad" or I "cheated." I made a less-healthy choice. I don't think I'll be running to make another. 

How is that a positive? Well, there are a few positives there: I chose a small bag of chips rather than a massive one, and I didn't judge myself. But the best part came in this week's therapy session; my therapist and I brainstormed and came up with a great list of things I can do for comfort or distraction:
call Paul
read a book
take a walk
go out with my camera
take a shower
sit in the gazebo
call a friend
play with my crystals
cross stitch
color
practice yoga
meditate
watch something funny
snuggle with one of the dogs
do a doggie play date with the neighbor
listen to music
clean
write ("name it to tame it")
spend 15 minutes tackling a large project (copying music from CDs to my Mac or sorting old photos).